Many of us have become more than frustrated at the Democrats’ perennial habit of shooting themselves in the foot. They have an unmatched record of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.
Are they really such incompetent idiots? Inclined as I am to be convinced of this, I’m compelled to consider an alternate view.
If I may, I’d like to suggest a possible method to their madness. Here's what I believe is the Democrats’ real platform.
They want McCain to win.
Stay with me here. The future hopes and aspirations of the Democratic Party lie in a McCain Presidency.
And it’s not just for Hillary’s ambitions for 2012 either. It can’t be that simple, but close.
If the Democrats actually let the debacle in Iraq work in their favor in retaking congress, maybe they have a grander vision.
First they allow McCain to steal the election. As if they would resist! And then they watch idly as the economy collapses, and chaos quickly grows pandemic. As all hell breaks loose, the Democrats will feebly try to pin the whole mess on the Republicans. Simple, right?
Unfortunately the Republicans will have been in power long enough to convince the American sheeple it was all liberalism’s fault.
Then the Democrats will announce their new "shift to the center" (somewhere to the right of Reagan) so the nation can move on, in the spirit of unity. Meaning we will continue the corporate/Republican agenda.
Halliburton will be granted exclusive privatization of our highways and infrastructure. Citizens will be charged a users’ fee to be conveniently deducted from their paycheck, savings, or IRA.
Blackwater’s Homeland Security Service will cruise the streets and randomly pop into citizens’ homes for their unannounced Patriotism Inspection. Everyone will agree they feel safer.
If the Blackwater Contractors deem it necessary, books, music, and home computers will be cleansed of unpatriotic material and the owners will be sent to Camp Goodling for re-education.
Bipartisan success will be trumpeted from the White House and Americans will all contentedly return to their couches. There they will have the luxury to watch their choice of over two hundred and thirty Fox channels on TV.
They will be told in a fair and balanced way that life has never been better in America.
And they will believe.