Thursday, August 28, 2008

A Sunny Day

Tonight there seems to be a divine message to those Bible thumpers at Focus on the Family.

You may have heard about the call for their flock to pray for rain on the Democrats in the stadium in Denver. It turned out to be a sunny day.

I guess God had other plans. That won't stop the Republicans, though.

It’s looking like they are going to have to steal another election.

They may have to show once again, their god doesn't approve of democracy.

Just like in 2000.

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

We Are All POW's Now

On last night’s talk show, Jay Leno asked John McCain jokingly, “For one million dollars, how many houses do you have?”

Johnny McRealestate replied, “Could I just mention to you, Jay, that, at a moment of seriousness .I spent five-and-a-half years in a prison cell. I didn’t have a house. I didn’t have a kitchen table. I didn’t have a table. I didn’t have a chair. And I didn’t spend those five-and-a-half years because, not because I wanted to get a house when I got out.”

It’s gonna be a LONG two months before he steals this election!

How many more times will Johnny McP.O.W. play this card? Since Americans are eating this crap up by the buckets, I predict at least another couple dozen times.

I hate to tell you folks this, but America has been held POW for eight years now.

And we are all in for serving at least four more years as Prisoners Of WARMONGERS!

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

What A Disgrace!

My in box was blessed yet again with another forwarded right wing outrage. This time it could very well be the defining issue of the election, perhaps even for the future of humanity!

At the very least it was an idiot’s guide to voting.

I’m particularly filled with pride by having the good fortune of seeing Ted Nugent was a previous recipient of this crucial message. Don’t you love it when your email address gets mindlessly forwarded along with the propaganda out to the seething masses?

The spam was kindly sent out by a “Good Republikaner” who took on the mission to alert Americans to the dastardly deed of one “despicable” Barack Obama.

What offending horror could Obama have committed this time?

Here’s what I learned. The wording is left as it was received.

“WHAT A DISGRACE!!! AND HE IS ALL AMERICAN????

Obama The Patriot - Removes American Flag From His PlaneBarack Obama recently finished a $500,000 total overhaul of his 757. And as part of the new design, he decided to remove the American flag from the tail...

What American running for President of the United States would remove the symbol of his country? And worse, he replaced the flag with it with a symbol of himself... Obama is such a despicable human being.

Please forward this if you're not ashamed of our country and our flag & if think this is a disgrace.”

Not wanting to be ashamed of our country, I did the patriotic thing. I replied to my fellow Americans with whom I was privileged to share this news.

*****
Thank you for bringing this urgent and compelling matter to my attention. I was wondering who I should vote for.

This really makes me think hard... And it is clearly the biggest REAL ISSUE that finally made up my mind. It sure does make me mad!

Why does Obama HATE AMERICA??

The MONSTER! He had his plane repainted! Every other presidential candidate does this for the last part of the campaign, but Obama did it wrong.

Why would anyone even think about voting for Obama?

That would be disgraceful and un-American. Just like removing the stylized flag image of the North American Airlines corporate logo on a plane. It was not a REAL flag, of course, or even a “symbol of his country”. It was a CORPORATE LOGO. Why, come to think of it, desecrating a corporate logo should be a crime in itself! Never mind there’s still an accurate flag depiction next to the exterior registration numbers on the plane. Just like on McCain’s plane.

It would just be stupid to elect Obama. Especially if you think about the outstanding public service we’ve seen from Bush and McCain.

Republican leadership sure has done a “heck of a job” with our employment opportunities, our economy, and international respect. And for our own good, I’m sure; they devalued our dollar to an unbelievable low. The Canadian dollar is leaving ours in the dust. If you have to ask what the dollar value of the Euro is now, you can’t afford it.

CEO pay has gone up even faster than OUR purchasing power has declined. And who can’t love the sweetheart tax breaks and legislation for the pharmaceutical industry and Big Oil? Corporate lobbyists and big business SHOULD be allowed to continue writing our laws to maximize their profit. That’s what good government is for, right? The more we transfer our tax dollars into rich Republicans’ pockets, the greater America becomes.

Our kids will love us for the trillions of dollars of debt we’ll leave them. They will thank us for the lessons in responsibility and character. Just like making an example of those losers facing bankruptcy for medical expenses.

And above all, we can’t let the tax breaks for the richest Republican donors expire. They’ve already bought the government, why tax them, too?

And so, my friends, it is simple to see. What kind of fool would think change is needed?

God bless America! And may He continue to bless us with the greed that makes Him love US best.

*****

I could have sent my response along to “Uncle Ted”, but I’m just a little too worried about straying within rifle range of him. He’s a better shot than his buddy Dick Cheney.

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Democratic Party Platform

Many of us have become more than frustrated at the Democrats’ perennial habit of shooting themselves in the foot. They have an unmatched record of snatching defeat from the jaws of victory.

Are they really such incompetent idiots? Inclined as I am to be convinced of this, I’m compelled to consider an alternate view.

If I may, I’d like to suggest a possible method to their madness. Here's what I believe is the Democrats’ real platform.

They want McCain to win.

Stay with me here. The future hopes and aspirations of the Democratic Party lie in a McCain Presidency.

And it’s not just for Hillary’s ambitions for 2012 either. It can’t be that simple, but close.

If the Democrats actually let the debacle in Iraq work in their favor in retaking congress, maybe they have a grander vision.

First they allow McCain to steal the election. As if they would resist! And then they watch idly as the economy collapses, and chaos quickly grows pandemic. As all hell breaks loose, the Democrats will feebly try to pin the whole mess on the Republicans. Simple, right?

Unfortunately the Republicans will have been in power long enough to convince the American sheeple it was all liberalism’s fault.

Then the Democrats will announce their new "shift to the center" (somewhere to the right of Reagan) so the nation can move on, in the spirit of unity. Meaning we will continue the corporate/Republican agenda.

Halliburton will be granted exclusive privatization of our highways and infrastructure. Citizens will be charged a users’ fee to be conveniently deducted from their paycheck, savings, or IRA.

Blackwater’s Homeland Security Service will cruise the streets and randomly pop into citizens’ homes for their unannounced Patriotism Inspection. Everyone will agree they feel safer.

If the Blackwater Contractors deem it necessary, books, music, and home computers will be cleansed of unpatriotic material and the owners will be sent to Camp Goodling for re-education.

Bipartisan success will be trumpeted from the White House and Americans will all contentedly return to their couches. There they will have the luxury to watch their choice of over two hundred and thirty Fox channels on TV.

They will be told in a fair and balanced way that life has never been better in America.

And they will believe.

Friday, August 15, 2008

August Surprise

It’s no surprise that Americans have no clue about the conflict in the former Soviet state of Georgia. As far as the corporate American media is concerned, all we need to know is whatever George Bush and their anointed future president John McCain tell us.

"Bullying and intimidation are not acceptable ways to conduct foreign policy in the 21st century," Bush said. With a straight face, even. If that one didn’t make you burst out laughing at the utter hypocrisy, then you are dismissed. There is nothing for you to read here, or anywhere else for that matter.

McCain denounced Russia by claiming, "In the 21st century nations don't invade other nations." God help us if we’re as stupid as they think we are. If that isn’t the finest slice of Orwellian doublethink, well I haven’t seen it.

Then Johnny (There-Will-Be-More-Wars) McCain adds this little nugget. “We are all Georgians.” What the hell is that supposed to mean? Do we all need to pick up our rifles to go defend the barricades in Tbilisi?

For years McCain’s neocon foreign policy advisor Randy Scheunemann was a lobbyist for the Georgian government. So that would make Johnny Bomb Bomb the perfect impartial observer to enlighten Americans about Georgia, right?

Aren’t we awake enough to see yet? How the hell do we still allow these neocons into our political process?

Americans have no concept of what conflict of interest is anymore. That has been demonstrated more than enough times by now.

The comments from these Republican thugs and warmongers almost make me sympathetic to the Russians.

Of course, the real victims are the innocent civilians. Again. Even when it’s between two dictators, we can’t let a conflict go by without taking sides and making things worse.

The American people are told poor little Georgia is a pro-western democracy, that has been mercilessly and without provocation, invaded by the former evil empire. Yes, a democracy sort of like ours. McCain’s good friend, with the name Johnny hasn’t learned to pronounce yet, is their kind of guy. President Saakashvili has been accused of falsifying elections. Many have claimed Saakashvili used his position as incumbent to skew the vote in his favor, that opposition supporters were intimidated on polling day and the count was fraudulent. Maybe this is why Johnny says we are all Georgians.

In their version of democracy, much of Georgia’s 4.5 million population say that they have not felt any benefits yet. Many say that Saakashvili shows scorn for democratic freedoms and the rights of ordinary people.

So what else, besides defending Republican style democracy, makes us so passionate about protecting Georgia? Why, oil, naturally. Yes, there’s a pipeline running from the Caspian Sea through Georgia. OUR pipeline, no doubt. Well, not only ours. Israel has a huge interest in it as well. I guess that thickens the plot, eh? US and Israeli military contractors and advisors are on the ground as we speak. No doubt there are mercenaries salivating for blood and profit in this one, too.

None of this comes as a surprise to anyone who has been watching this region. Saakashvili has been lulled into thinking we have his back for his military assault on the citizens of South Ossetia.
Many think this may be the big neocon October surprise for the upcoming US election. What a perfect international crisis to scare voters into voting for McCain. Here we go again.

Unfortunately, real people suffer when these monsters play their power games. What about the residents of South Ossetia? Why are they becoming pawns in this cruel contest?

Since the break-up of the Soviet Union, the people in the regions of South Ossetia and Abkhazia live in a strange state of geographical limbo. They have nothing in common with Georgia and are closer to Russia. The South Ossetians are kin and kindred to their fellow North Ossetians inside the Russian border. The people in South Ossetia, as well as those in Abkhazia, speak Russian, use Russian rubles, work in Russia, vote in Russia, have Russian passports, and the elderly even collect Russian pensions.

South Ossetians have been striving for independence for years. South Ossetia and Abkhazia both broke away from Georgia in savage fighting when the Soviet Union disintegrated.

In 1990 South Ossetia tried to break from Tbilisi’s rule. After hundreds of people were killed, Russian peacekeepers were deployed in South Ossetia in 1992 as part of an armistice deal with Georgia.

Tensions increased when in 2006 Russian Army officers were detained in Georgia on spying charges. Russia then imposed sanctions on Georgia.

In November of 2006 South Ossetia overwhelmingly endorsed its separation from Georgia in a referendum. Georgia then accused Russia of provoking war.

In 2008 South Ossetia asked for independence. We know how well that was received. No independence and no democracy for South Ossetia.

Finally on the night of August 7, 2008, just in time to be in the shadow of the opening ceremony of the Olympics, Saakashvili ordered an all-out military attack on Tskhinvali, the capital of South Ossetia. The aerial bombardments and ground attacks were primarily against civilian targets. These included residential areas, hospitals and the university. The city was largely destroyed and around 1500 people were killed.

In response, Russia sent in tanks and troops to ”protect” the separatists.

So why did they continue to advance further into Georgia? I guess it’s all just a game for the evil empires. I don’t know.

What I DO know is this. As Johnny Bomb Bomb postures as the next great American war president, we are NOT all Georgians!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Corporate News Network Watchdogs

Waiting for the interview, the nervous job applicant could have been quietly reassuring himself with these thoughts, “I have the education, experience and dedication to the rule of law. Since it is not a political appointment, I am more than eligible for this position.”

That would be when White House liaison for the Justice Department Monica Goodling, fresh out of Pat Robertson’s law school, would ask him some questions.

"What is it about George W. Bush that makes you want to serve him?"

“Serve Bush?” The startled job seeker may have replied. “I thought that I would be employed by, and in service to, the people of the United States.”

Pursing her lips with displeasure at the response, Ms. Goodling would give him another chance.

“Why are you a Republican?”

At this point the job candidate might think he was in the wrong building and check to see if he was really at the Justice Department.

While he was leaving, his name was plugged into a data search, along with key words and phrases such as “guns,” “homosexual,” “sex,” “Florida re-count,” and “abortion”.

The better qualified candidate was always dumped in favor of the politically correct one. Loyalty always trumped competence.

If this sounds familiar, the identical “affirmative action” system was used for filling jobs in the critical early days of the Iraq occupation. It sure worked out well there, didn’t it?

What has happened to the United States Department of Justice?

It was being transformed into a politicized law enforcement agency. No longer was its mission to fairly enforce federal law; it was now in business to enforce the will of the ruling Republican Party. Their mission was now being directed by “Bush’s Brain”, Karl Rove and the sleazy Alberto (I-Don’t-Recall-Remembering) Gonzales.

The effects of this corruption were becoming more visible than ever.

U.S. Attorneys were fired for investigating and prosecuting crooked Republican politicians like California Representative Duke Cunningham. They were fired for not investigating trumped up voter fraud allegations targeting Democrats.

Rove was pushing for the framing and jailing of former Democratic Governor of Alabama Don Siegelman so the Republican would win.

Attorney Generals Ashcroft, Gonzales and Mukasey were keeping the Department busy blocking oversight of the Administration’s numerous wrongdoings.

Eventually Democrats gained the majority needed for congressional investigation.

After poor Al Gonzales proved incapable of remembering anything at the hearings, it was Monica’s turn.

“I believe I crossed the lines, but I didn’t mean to,” she told the committee.

When asked how often this type of hiring practice occurred she said, “I don’t think that I could have done it more than fifty times, but I don’t know.”

I hope you’re as reassured as I am. She “didn’t mean it,” around fifty times. That’s OK then, I guess.

This sordid tale is now all detailed in a Justice Department Inspector General’s report now released.

I bet the liberal media is going to take up this issue with a renewed zeal for the truth, and launch a series of probing follow up investigations, right?

Let’s look at what CNN’s Wolf Blitzer, from the “most trusted name in news,” had to say last week.

“The United States Justice Department is supposed to enforce U.S. laws, but a new investigation suggests that the Bush Administration may have violated those laws when it hung out the ‘help wanted’ sign at the Justice Department.”

We are told the investigation “suggests” they “may have” violated laws. There’s some tough, hard-nosed reporting for you. Or would that be brown-nosed reporting? The Corporate News Network could not admit the report STATED they DID VIOLATE the laws.

This isn’t the only case of right wing bias or editing going on at CNN lately.

On July 25th the House Judiciary Committee held a hearing investigating White House abuses of power.

Several people went on record testifying to the Bush Cartel’s long list of malfeasance and treachery.

Here are sample comments from Rep. Hank Johnson (D-Ga.).

But I ask, would impeachment be a vehicle to restore life and vitality to the delicate system of checks and balances, which is the hallmark of our Constitution and which this administration has shattered--aided and abetted by the do-nothing, Republican-controlled, rubber-stamp Congress which failed to exercise its constitutional responsibility to oversee the operations of the executive branch of our government?

Warrantless wiretapping of Americans; torturing and kidnapping and detaining numerous prisoners, foreign enemy combatants, prisoners, whatever they could be classified as; the fact that we have become a severely surveilled population now with the abuses of the Patriot Act--all done under the cloak of government secrecy. Political spying; the attacks on academic freedom; the politicization of the Justice Department; selective prosecutions--so many areas fertile for inquiring by this Congress.

As you see, very serious issues were brought up; issues that could be easily viewed as highly relevant to the preservation of our Constitution.

Come on, liberal media, show us the outrage! Shine your light of journalistic integrity on the hopes of freedom loving Americans.

Oops, here comes Campbell Brown of CNN’s Election Center. That’s all right, just because her husband is Bush loyalist Dan Senor, former deputy press secretary, and spokesman for the Coalition Provisional Authority in Iraq, I’m sure she will be as fair and balanced as Senor’s new employer, Fox News.

Ms. Brown begins, "Believe it or not, there was a congressional hearing today about impeaching the president," adding: "It was all stagecraft, though." Brown introduced CNN correspondent Erica Hill by saying, "Tell us about this piece of Kabuki theater, Erica."

Hill explained: "From the beginning it was pretty clear this was all just stagecraft, for what one Republican lawmaker deemed impeachment light."

"The Democratic leadership made it clear impeachment is not on the table at this hearing today for two reasons. Not only is there not enough time left in President Bush's term, but also they know any real impeachment hearings at this point could cause a major backlash."

Thank you, Erica. We sure would hate to see the Constitution’s pesky and unpatriotic impeachment provision intruding here at this point in history. Please assure us that the President isn’t too concerned about this theatrical stunt.

She obliges, "As for the president today, clearly, not too worried about this hearing. He was in Peoria, Illinois. As you can see here, kissing babies, smiling, taking pictures."

That’s a relief. Now if Campbell could just wrap this all up and put it into perspective for us, we can focus on more important things.

She closed the report by saying: "All right. So this is really just stagecraft, not to mention a real waste of taxpayer money and Congress' time."

Wonderful. It’s a good thing we have watchdogs like you and your husband, making sure we don’t waste any taxpayer money in Iraq, too.

Americans can now move along. There’s nothing to see here, folks.

Say, let’s watch that clip again of McCain saying Obama would rather lose a war than lose an election.