Friday, April 1, 2011

Wake Up, America!

You know, lately I've begun to realize how extreme my political perspective has become. I have now come to understand the Big Picture more clearly. I think it's time to moderate my thinking a bit. After all, why should I blame Republicans and conservadems for our national troubles? Liberals must take their share of the blame, since they were in power for most of the last three decades. FOX (R) is just what we need for sensible balance to the radically liberal corporate media. I wish Progressives would get a clue and figure it out. The Republican Party and their donors only want what's best for every American. They are the epitome of freedom and democracy. George Bush and Dick Cheney left us a gloriously free and prosperous America, until Obama the Socialist used ACORN and the New Black Panthers to steal the election. Now we see his Marxist plans for the destruction of America are rolling over the interests of Wall Street and the Chamber of Commerce. They are powerless to stop him. He could very well be the anti-Christ! Wake up, America!

13 comments:

Tom Harper said...

I'm glad you've finally come around. You're a perfect shining example of how an America-hating moonbat can be waken up and converted to the Right way of thinking.

And I expect to see you in church this Sunday. The 8:00 service is supposed to have a wonderful sermon on the evils of socialism.

Dave Dubya said...

Thanks, Tom. Going to church is for sheeple. I'm so inspired by Baker/Robertson/Falwell/Swaggart et al that I'm going to start my very own First Church of Mammon. Our creed will be, "Salvation: You get what you pay for".

My first sermon will be, "God really does love the rich best. For a ten thousand dollar donation, you too can learn how money buys both Heaven and Earth".

Next week will be, "Holy Hatred: Why just blame 9-11 on liberals, gays and the ACLU? They are to blame for everything".

Can I hear an "Amen"?

One Fly said...

must be off your feed

Commander Zaius said...

April's Fool day sucks hind tit. I've fallen for several of these types of posts today.

I need a beer.

John Myste said...

I am going to post my April Fools Post on May 1st, to make it more believable. No one will see that coming.

Dave, your words made such sense that I did not even realize they were written in Jest until Mr. Beach spoiled it. I was about to tell you how I agree with every word.

Mary Mayhem said...

Someone hacked your blog!
Wait, most tea partiers aren't bright enough to do that. It must be April Fool's day.....

Sue said...

Hey Dave I laughed out loud!

I'm a huge fan of Baker/Robertson/Falwell/Swaggart too. And the Church of Mormon....Oh um, I mean Mammon!

Kulkuri said...

I saw this on April 2nd, so my first thought was you were off your meds.

First Church of Mammon. Our creed will be, "Salvation: You get what you pay for".
Is that creed or GREED???

Darrell Michaels said...

Well, I THOUGHT you were having an epiphany... :)

Jolly Roger said...

Nice. I couldn't agree more with you, BTW.

Dave Dubya said...

Thanks, all. As much as I love satire, I'm not sure I'll do any more of these. I think I understand why the Righties love saying these things. One feels a particular surge of dark energy coursing through one's being. The anger and hatred fuel a biochemical reaction that reinforces a sense of self-righteousness. Now I know how easy it is for people to go over to the Dark Side. Scapegoating and blaming those you are indoctrinated to dislike really feeds into some kind of euphoria. It is the unfortunate side of human nature that allows the rise of tyrants and totalitarianism.

I thought this was just for fun, but I actually learned something. Powerful negative forces are at play, and they can suck an unwitting soul into darkness.

Yes, TP, I did have an epiphany after all.

S.W. Anderson said...

Right, LOL, and the founding fathers wouldn't rest until they had ended slavery. And Libya is sort of in southwest Asia. And the House of Representatives can pass legislation into law all by itself.

How did that song go? Oh yes, don't worry, be happy . . . la, la, la. . .

Dave Dubya said...

Beach,
I thought I'd try my hand at fiction. I have a long way to go to match what you've been writing lately.

SW,
Like the Republican Congressman said, this stuff in Libya could spread to Africa.